Microwave ovens in Pompeii and a Kindle with the Dead Sea Scrolls – An Interview with Glenn Scrimshaw
Glenn Scrimshaw is the author of The Vampire Eloim Series
To celebrate the release of the third book in the series, The Demon, The Witch and a Teenage Vampire, the first book, Bleed with Style is available FREE for a limited time on Smashwords. The voucher code to get Bleed with Style FREE is BN59D
Books in The Vampire Eloim Series:
Bleed with Style
Eloim is a rebellious teen. He does well in his studies, there was no disputing that, but he finds them far too easy and so he looks for other things to occupy his mind. Things like sneaking out and finding trouble – BIG trouble. His sister can’t always be there to cover his back but she tries.
One night he goes too far and the punishment is unexpected – life can be tough when you’re a vampire…
The Missing Sacrifice
A family holiday to Paris starts off well – until Eloim meets a sexy succubus on a boy's night out at an Abba tribute concert. Eloim's natural ability to find trouble reaches a new height as werewolves, demons and the greatest vampire hunters in Transylvania hunt for the cross dressing vampire teenager.
The second of the vampire Eloim short stories sees Eloim blunder through a plot to depose a king while struggling to stay as fashionable and stylish as only he can be.
Eloim and his siblings begin their search for a way to rescue their sister Polly who was taken by the Demon Alexia. With his new friend, the werewolf Prince Oliver, Eloim sets off to find a vampire witch who may be able to help them sneak into the demon realms.
But as usual, Eloim's plans don't run smoothly. Caught up in the plots of the still obsessed Demon Alexia, Eloim finds himself in a strange place, having to deal with something totally new…
The return of the stylish teenage vampire in his third adventure.
Firstly, tell us about your book/series.
My stories are about the Vampire Eloim, a teenage cross dressing vampire with a passion for fashion and a thirst for blood. He is surrounded by his protective vampire family who all do their best to try and keep him out of trouble which isn’t an easy task. Eloim is a walking disaster zone and nothing goes as he plans it but he stumbles through dressed in the best designer clothing he can steal. While he has a natural ability in his studies he often gets bored so will play pranks on his family or sneak off into the city in search of excitement. After a run in with some vampire slayers Eloim finds his punishment from his vampire parents leads to a dangerous confrontation that will change his undead life.
If you want a vampire story with plenty of action and some laughs then these may appeal to you. The stories introduce you to a strange world where the Vatican is spoiling for a war with the Vampires and a civil war is brewing with the werewolves who rule Transylvania. Into all this walks Eloim who only cares about what outfit he should wear so he looks awesome. The third book is due for release on Valentine’s day, It follows on from The Missing Sacrifice as Eloim begins a quest to rescue his sister who has been kidnapped and taken to hell. The story sees a return for the werewolf Prince Oliver and also Eloim’s arch enemy the Demon Alexia. It also introduces a new character, a Vampire witch with a few strange habits and odd views. I also slipped in Eloim finding a girlfriend, I finally crumbled and added a hint of romance but love will not run smooth for the teenager.
To tie in with the release of the third book there is going to be a code available on my Facebook page for you to get Eloim’s first adventure Bleed with Style for free from Smashwords. The code will be valid from Valentine’s day and good for a week so if you haven’t discovered the Vampire Eloim then you can get his first outing for free.
What are you working on at the moment?
At the moment I’m working on ideas for the next Eloim story and the third book in my comedy Science Fiction Series, The Alienbutt Saga. The idea is if I work on two totally different stories I can flick between the two as I work out ideas and run into dead ends. This plan usually works when bottles of whisky are added into the mix of writing and I just see what happened the next morning when I read what I’ve wrote.
What inspired you to become a writer?
I sort of fell into writing by mistake and somehow I ended up with a book. It started with a group of us posting on a game discussion board as our in-game characters, it was just a bit of fun but one of them suggested I should write a story. Having no idea what I was doing I just started writing and posting it online and the feedback I received was I should get it published. Still knowing no better I worked at finishing the story and self-published a really bad first version just so I could have a copy on my bookshelf. I mean this book was to grammar what a brick is to aerodynamics, it had heard of punctuation but chose to go for Whisky English that doesn’t require such things.
By some miracle the people at Gingernut books got hold of a copy and saw a story in the butchered English and offered to publish it once it was fixed up and they had it properly proofread and edited.
How long have you been writing?
I’ve only been writing for maybe a couple of years, it wasn’t planned and I still class myself as a drunken story teller as I’ve far too much to learn to be considered an author or serious writer. I write funny daft stories and I’m lucky enough to get to share them and have people enjoy them.
What is your relationship with your characters? Do you have a favourite? Is there one that you find a bit more difficult?
I find Eloim easy to write, I place him into situations and let him run with doing the most stupid things possible. He doesn’t mean any harm but he just attracts trouble and everything ends in disaster. I’ve developed his character and interacted online as him with others in games and groups so his reactions to events just flow. The other characters I tend to struggle with more as I tend to base them on people I meet online and have to think how they would react .
Is there anything that you find challenging about being a writer?
The hardest thing for me is grammar and punctuation, it’s something I’ve always struggled with and much of it just will not stick in my head. I’m lucky to have a great proof reader and editor that put up with me and my shortcomings.
Do you write freehand at all or straight onto your pc?
I will sometimes scribble down an idea on a scrap of paper or quickly sketch a picture to keep an idea from disappearing until I can get to my computer. I find a quick doodle will set an idea in place better than a couple of sentences so I use that as it also helps me visualise characters and events.
Mainly though I just start typing at my PC and see what happens and often I don’t even have much of a plan worked out for my stories.
Do you have a strict writing routine/word count per day?
I’m not that organised, plus if I try that then I end up deleting most, if not all of what I write. I sit down with a bottle of whisky on a night and see if my voices will tell me a story to write down. You see I really cannot be classed as an author, I’m a story teller that got published.
Is there one question that you wish that you would be asked in an interview? If so, what is it and what’s the answer?
The question I would love to be asked is
How is the hotel we paid for you to stay in?
And my answer would be,
It’s amazing thank you, it’s my first time visiting America.
What do you think causes people’s enduring fascination with vampires?
I think for many it is the romance of the legends and the fact vampires do not age, to be forever young and watch as the centuries slip by. I’m personally dragged more to the not getting old and watching how society changes with the passage of time.
Do you have any plans to write in a different genre in the future?
I write (hopefully) comedy stories, my Vampire Eloim and Science Fiction Alienbutt Saga are both comedies and based in the daft and stupid edge of their fields. I do have an idea floating around my head about demon possession, I submitted a short to Awesome online magazine about how possession would be seen from the demons point of view. This will be a serious story if I can pull it off but with a twist on the usual demons are bad and must be cast out. I’m finding it quiet hard to do and it’s taking a little time as it’s totally different to how I usually write.
Are you also an avid reader? What are you reading at the moment?
I am when I get the chance and time, once I start a book I find it very difficult to put down. At the moment I’ve just started Dodger by Terry Pratchett as I’m a big fan and been reading all his books since my teens. When I get the chance I can devour books and now I’ve finally moved into the digital age and got a kindle I think I will be reading more.
Doctor Who has just arrived in his Tardis. He puts you charge of the time machine, what would you do?
I would go back in time and plant modern items in ancient sites just to confuse the historians when they are found. Place a microwave oven in a house in Pompeii, a kindle with the Dead Sea Scrolls and a selection of model aeroplanes in Tutankhamun tomb. Why change a single event in history when you can throw all our recorded history into chaos.
The vampires are attacking! Grab the first thing you see to your right and hit them with it! What was it? And how do you think you did in the ensuing fight?
A glass jar full of pencils… well if I was a ninja type maybe I could have staked it through the heart but as I’m far from that I’m hoping I can distract it with an offer of a hand drawn portrait.
The afore mentioned vampire attack didn’t go so well and you were bitten by the vampire…now what?
Well that easy, I make a list of victims and go out to paint the town red.
In the event of a zombie apocalypse what item would you make sure that you took with you to your underground safety bunker? (we will presume that your family are already safely in the bunker!)
Plenty of whisky and all the books I’ve been meaning to read while I wait for the all clear. Fighting zombie hoards is dangerous so I would wait until the worst was over before surfacing.
You are planning an awesome dinner party. Which 3 celebrities/fictional characters/historical figures (past or present) would you add to your guest list?
I’m not a big celebrity type person but would love to have Dr Who, Albert Einstein and Leonardo D’Vinci sit around a table. I would be totally out of my depth in what they talked about but it would be amazing to listen to what they had to say.
Can you give us five random facts about yourself?
Five random facts… well I used to play the French Horn when I was at school and was in a concert band. Second one is I’ve never been inside a betting shop (bookmakers). Third one is I used to wear black nail polish and be a bit goth. Fourth one would be I do my own decorating and could rewire your house. Finally the fifth and final random fact is it took me over half an hour to think up the first four.
Do you have any advice for aspiring writers?
I would pass on the best two bits of advice I’ve been given. First one is you know where your story starts but make sure you know where it’s going to end. A lot of books never get finished because the writer does not know the end of the story. If you have a start and an end you just have to join up the two with the middle bit.
Secondly, a proof reader is essential, no matter how often you check your work yourself you will always miss bits and after each draft leave your story for a couple of weeks before going back to it. You want your story to be the best it can be and not to have it shot down for things that can easily be fixed.
Is there anything you would like to say to your readers?
Thank you for reading, I know it’s time you will never get back so I appreciate you chose to waste your time with me and I hope I didn’t come across as a right idiot. If you ever read any of my stories I hope you will recommend me to your friends as either a fun read or stay silent and just tell the people you don’t really like that much that they should buy all my work.
I guess I'm the writer responsible for the Alienbutt Saga and the Vampire Eloim short stories. Some people have been trying to claim I am an author but don't be fooled as it's not true. I'm just a drunken story teller that somehow managed to get a publisher.
So about me, well I was born and brought up in the heart of South Yorkshire where i stayed for about the first twenty years of my life. I left there to go to university in Sunderland to study art but that didn't work out, after a few years of moving around I ended up living in Amber Valley in Derbyshire (For those not from the UK, near Nottingham, just think Robin Hood) After trying various things to make money I ended up writing a story for fun and it went down so well I get to write more. I have no idea where this is going but it's fun finding out.